My cup is empty

My cup is empty

 

Here we are smack dab in the middle of summer vacation, when I’m not working my teaching job.. my kids are not in school.... and this week all the doubts of “ I can’t possibly do this” are coming crashing down.

 

How are we possibly going to do this when we’re working full time? I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

 

I would say that my tolerance level isn’t great and my patience is probably my weakest skill. So how is this going to work? I don’t know, I really don’t. The voices telling me I am not equipped for this are speaking soooo loudly this week.

 

Just every day decisions like making dinner... or lunch... or breakfast.... wait, why do I have to cook so much? Feel overwhelming, exhausting in this constant barrage of information and decisions society. Adding one more thing feels daunting. By far this feels like my biggest task.

 

I have walked through some deep valleys and come out the other side, they weren’t ones I chose so in some ways this feels harder because I am choosing this. The possible failure is on me not circumstance, and yet we could and probably will be better for it... but what if we’re not?

 

Cup is empty. That is all.

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